No title, Just my feelings on the time

First of all, thanks for forgiving although you said not all my fault... =)
Hope we can still be together happily...
(sound so wrong??? @.@)

And I don't know what to do now...
my turn, lost my justification on this problem...
I knew it was my fault and you have 迁就 me for many things...
but this one you can't, and I can't tolerate also...
change is something that say is easy but do is hard.
I found that also, now is not the time for me to change.

Sorry for can't tolerate your wish
yet, I can't find a reason to forgive what you have post...
thanks, it really hurt me
and make my stereotype towards 'gs' become deeper...
it is untrustworthy and insecure...

That's all... good luck for every one~ =)

这星期的我

放假一个星期，在家休息了一个星期！

见了我的老同学，那久违相逢的感觉...还好...

朋友要结婚了所以见面的机会多了，

一起去KTV唱歌，喝茶，吃早餐，看戏，谈心事，逛街和骑摩托吹风...很久没那么一起活动了...

让我回想以前的种种...

相见后，发觉大家都成长了许多，

而我好像没什么大变化...

不管如何，大家都在为生活努力着，所以要珍惜彼此相聚的机会 =)

我也学到了一些新知识...

那是舅舅说的...

意思大概是这样：

-虽然读得高学位，但不要高傲。

-做你想要做的，不管是对还是错的决定，

但一旦失败了别后悔，回来休息后再次作战。

-要知道不管遇到好的坏的事情，要想到的是你还有你的家人。

虽然舅舅读书不多，但这些都是我觉得有道理的话。

他让我上了一堂课。

从中我也知道了一些我不知道的事情...

我发现我不大了解我姐姐...

探望舅舅那一天我懂了许多...

每当想起，我会想哭...

不懂是因为激动还是伤心...

可就希望坏的事情不要发生就好了...

在家的情绪好很多了...

也许习惯了家人对我的方式：

-不敢吵我（因为我的脾气坏）

-一个人睡

所以静的时间就很多...

当我心情不好的时候，

选择只有几种，一个人

-大吵大闹（炸歌，喊，乱丢东西）

-静静的（听抒情歌或音乐，哭，睡觉）

-吃很多（零食或吃不停）

-看戏，做一些傻事...

就这样慢慢的让自己的情绪平复。

这一次我用了比较长的时间让自己平复，

上面的方法全都用了，

也希望会没事了...

要相信自己，12345 我成功了...

若那是4，我可以解决的！

若是6，我也可以！

也谢谢你给我的解说... =)

玩够了，那压力也来了

玩到休息不够，忧虑的感觉，

所以生病了 :p

还好现在好多了...

因为要上战场打仗了...

哟哟哟...加油呗！哈哈...

愿大家安康 ~\(≧▽≦)/~

惊人还是悲哀

唉~一波未平一波又起...都不知道走什么衰运...
你到底发生了什么事？
接到姐姐的来电时心抽搐了，也寒了...
到底是什么事情让你做出了这样的决定？我很想知道...
你生病了吗？还是背后有人唆使你？
我气，可我也担心...
你真的要做到这样的地步吗？连家人都不要了？
我好伤心难过...想哭可是又哭不出来，很辛苦...
如果你有事或有什么苦衷为什么不和我们谈呢？
到底家那里对你不好了？做了什么事让你变成这个摸样？我想不通...

你让我觉得自己很失败。
明明读的是心理学，可是对家事一点忙也帮不上...
这是所谓的能医不能自医吗？
其实我也害怕，害怕处理不好...
我不想与你对质，那只会让事情恶化...到底该怎么办呢？
这世界真的好恐怖，为什么你说变就变呢？？？

啊！好烦啊！
我唯一能做的只有好好读书，快快毕业，成为家的经济支柱之一了...
无奈无奈... 伤心伤心... 坚强吧~

Recent...

there has been a long time I do not update my blog...

is too busy with my fyp and assignments

I just curious, is my time management still worse or there have other reasons...

damn stress damn moody in this period

found out that I'm still the same, do not change much, sigh...

every time I feel that I'm a loser...

by the way, I am relief now...

is time to focus on final to chase back my marks

my friends do help me a lot recently...

actually I'm in in the emotionally unstable state.

thanks for their patient and comments

it does help me a lot to justify myself

I should be tough and strong

I do not want the same thing happen again although it happened already

I need to be selfish this time

I do not want my kindness being abused again

somehow, I never think that I am a kind person

I do not want make any decision while I losing control of my emotion

I read some of the article

I feel envy that they have such supported friend

feel glad for yours

here are something I realized....

ya...I realized that friend no need many but few with true heart is enough

be responsible to yourself and others

what is work what is emotion, you should make it clear! don't mix it with the works!

I hate waiting...hmm... must punctual! 

so defensive...

and...my confidence still haven develop...

there are few time want to voice out or ask question

but still do not do so, haiz...

like a "suk tou gui", useless!

I'm too concern and care what other people think and view

I should put this down

yet i still can't find my way...

however, I love myself more now

I can live with myself better than before (although not a healthy way)

don't care so much 

just want myself happy

my live fill with different colors

and all of this will be my memories for this 3 years

一句话

现在我只能告诉自己要坚强地面对一切，要勇敢！

这几天

This few days I feel very stress because I need to finish 2 presentations, 1 report, and 1 mid-term.

Damn feel frustrated and scare I will lose my emotional control again.

One thing I just can say is IN THIS WORLD NOTHING IS FAIR!!!

If you want fair, you need to get it yourself!

Argh!!!!!!

我要忍！
吃得苦中苦，方为人上人！

可是我很累~ =(

Emotional Unstable----Again!

I'm losing my strength to express my feeling...
No point for me to express though...
I don't have the energy to voice out my feeling, my thought...
I don't have the reason to explain all...
I just keep silent...
I feel so stress about all of the stuff that happened to me recently...
even though there had some happiness and good memories but it cant suppress my hard feeling...
I found out my soul is fly away
every morning I wake up, there is no goal that I searching for
My life is becoming meaningless...
I still can focus on study but not so
I hope the tiredness, stress and not feeling well that I'm facing is because of my study and the activities that I join.

I keep telling myself,
not my false,
no forcing,
let it be,
trouble come because of my stand no clear
I'm sorry to myself,
I don't even used any knowledge that I've learnt on myself
such a shame!
I just want cry, a way that I feel most comfortable with! Please! Let me CRY out!

( If you leave, please leave with silently or without doing anything, I don't need such thing! You can inform me but don't pretend in front of me! It even make me feel worst. If you hurt, sorry cause I cant do anything for you. Because you not understand me too. Sorry for not being true to myself sometimes. There is some reasons that you should understand. I don't like confront, I don't like explain, I just want you think clear when you make a decision. I know sometimes thinking too much while making decision is not good, but that's my way. It depends on what the decision that I need to make. All just make me feel myself bad...)

Just type out what come in my mind, so it looks messy...